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9 Reasons Why You Absolutely, Positively Should NOT Visit Jamaica in March or April

Search around a bit, and you’ll dig up a few reasons why you should supposedly visit Jamaica in March and April. But at Villa Serenity, we’re all about honesty. And that’s why we’re here to divulge all the dirty details about Jamaica during March and April: the too-perfect weather and the boring festivals, the glut of in-season food and you-have-to-see-them-to-believe-them peak-seasons prices.

Read on for the truth:

1. The Weather is Truly Appalling

Sunrise from Jamaica Ocean View villa beach

 

There’s a reason why January through March/April is considered the best time to visit Jamaica: The sun is shining and temperatures hover in the perfect 80s. Into April, you may even get a few refreshing and very short (think: minutes to an hour) rain showers. (Let’s call it rainbow season.) And really, could there be anything more unpleasant than sunshine, rainbows and perfect temperatures?

2. Easter in Jamaica is the WORST

 

The only thing worse than regular island life is island life during Easter. Easter in Jamaica is pretty awful, and at Villa Serenity you’ll have to put up with Chef Wayne whipping up delicious traditional foods, like mouthwatering fried fish and Jamaica’s famous Easter bun & cheese. It’s pure torture.

3. The Kite Festival is Boring

 

Every year around this time, the Jamaica International Kite Festival takes place just outside of Ocho Rios (home to Villa Serenity), at the Shazz Entertainment Grounds in St. Ann. If you hate bright colors, spectacular kites, blue skies, happy people and a healthy dose of live music and great food, you’re going to be absolutely miserable at the kite festival.

4. You’ll Have to Put up with Carnival

Photo Credit: Julians Promos

And speaking of ho-hum celebrations, Carnival in Jamaica (also known as Bacchanal) is about as dull as it gets, with six weeks of festivities (usually, February through April): soca parties, spectacular you-have-to-see-them-to-believe-them costumes, lively parades, live music, road marches, and some of the tastiest food on the island. No one deserves this level of tedium.

5. There’s Too Much Tasty Food in Season

 

 

If you loathe tasty food, you don’t want to visit Jamaica in March or April. In addition to Easter delicacies on the menu, these months produce some of the juiciest, tastiest and most exotic fruits – the otaheite/Ethiopia apple, sweet sop, ortanique, ugli fruit, and naseberry, among others. March is also the last month to get your fix of Jamaican lobster, as catching season is closed from April 1-June 30.

6. The Beaches are Hideous

 

All the sun and warm weather of March and April do no favors for our beaches. You’ll be subjected to powder-soft sands, aquamarine waters, and gentle waves, not to mention perfect sunbathing and swimming conditions. Brace yourself, though, because it gets worse: Snorkeling and scuba diving are also at their peak during these months, meaning you’ll have clear waters and gentle currents to explore the coral reefs around Ocho Rios.

7. Nothing Gets Cancelled

Jamaica villa activities

 

We all know that reliability and timeliness are the enemy of a good vacation, right? Consistently good weather throughout March and April means that your tours, excursions and other reservations are very, very unlikely to be rained-out; what’s more, since this is peak season, cancellations due to low reservation numbers are also rare. You’ll hate having your vacation go as planned.

8. Sailboat Profiles Mar Your Ocean View

 

We all know that nothing ruins an ocean view as fast as a sailboat. And in April, prepare for the view to get really bad, thanks to Montego Bay Yacht Club’s Easter Regatta. If you hate sunny skies and joyous sailboat races, ask Chauffer Name to steer very clear of this beloved annual event. But hey, if you want to take terrible photos of beautiful sailboats, Montego Bay is just over 90 minutes from Villa Serenity.

9. Peak Season Deals Are Too Good

 

If you hate a bulging wallet and great seasonal deals, avoid at all costs Villa Serenity in March and April. Averse to free? You’ll abhor our one-night-free Take Me Away! special. Detest discounts? Run, don’t walk away from our Sunshine Sale and its $1,000 off your Jamaican vacation. Can’t stand good food? Do not – we repeat, do not – ask for $500 in complimentary groceries in our Family Freebies discount. Saving money is the pits.

So, there you have it – 9 solid reasons why visiting Jamaica in March and April is a horrible idea. But hey, if you’re somehow drawn to perfect weather, and top-notch food, and dynamic festivals, and spectacular beaches, and all the other disadvantages of the season, you’ll probably also be interested in saving $1,000 off your Jamaican vacation.

Just don’t say we didn’t warn you.

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